I changed my mind

I told my sister I'd update this blog by Sunday. I have fifty solid minutes to meet this deadline, and with the Mountain Dew giving my fingers tremors, I feel like I'm back in college, spending half the time typing, the other half praying for a snow day. Such pressure. Especially because this is the first posting on a blog that doesn't really have any focus or real purpose. Many blogs out there have a theme or specific topic deemed important by the authors. A quick search on Google BlogSearch on the following topics revealed

Dinosaurs-1,143,379 Posts
Sports- about 139,198,727 posts
Dougnuts (Spelled properly) - 261,529 posts
Dougnuts (spelled d-o-n-u-t-s) - 799,657 posts
Satanism - 140,518 posts
Jesus Christ's New Line of Evening Wear - 2362 posts (i'm suspicious these blog searches are not very accurate)
Naughty School girls - more posts than sports yielded, but could not record the actual figure because ads began popping up like the zits on the faces of the young teenagers who are supporting those very sites at this exact moment.

See? All those blogs have a direction. I, on the other hand, am blogging without a road map and one of my front headlights out. I'm just trying to get through this first post so I can relax until I have to think of a topic again next week for the second post.

Anyway, the following is what I came up with for my very first posting on this blog. If I had to do it again, I'd probably add some more pizazz. Give the reader what he wants. More dinos and donuts if you will. Make uneducated and biased predictions on all of next week's football games (Boston College will win next week because they believe in Jesus, and through Jesus, everything is possible). Add cute, yellow emoticons to illustrate feelings that you are supposed to experience in case the words themselves do not convey them properly (insert winky face here).
Oh god, I hope this blog does not get cancelled before that Caveman show does (insert pouty, crying face here).

and without further ado...
Armin's first posting on All the Knots Undone

******

The Austrian philosopher, Ludwig Wittgenstein, was considered a genius for the ideas he put forth in his first book, Tractatus, but later in life recanted, revised, or completely denied most of what he originally believed.*

Similarly, the writer and existentialist, Albert Camus, an unwavering atheist in war-weary France, is said to have professed his faith in God on his death bed.

What's the point? We can all change our minds. I, for example, used to think blogging was the embarrassing, self promoting habit of the attention addict. And, actually, I still think that's about right. But, that doesn't stop me from starting this blog now, which, like millions of other blogs out there, will be self centered and bombastic because its author believes his experiences and thoughts are somehow of universal importance, when to be perfectly honest, there's many people out there who could say it better and have said it better already. But blogging is free and since there are absolutely no prerequisites or qualifications necessary to start one, even the dumbest of us bloggers can have our voices heard.

And fortunately, blogs are free to read as well, so you are free to read this and enjoy it, or piss on it, or promote your own blog through the comments section.

Here's a poem that occasionally rhymes, but otherwise, has no discernable pattern.

GIFTS

For my birthday this year, 
I'd like a jar.
Nothing fancy,
But big, large as my head.  
Big enough to hold 
two pints of formaldehyde
and my brain when
I'm dead.

Now I know what you're going to say
that people only save the brains of the 
REMARKABLE
your Einsteins and Whitmans
so we can scan them with lasers
and stick them with needles
poking for secrets until we can figure
out the mystery: "Why were they more special
than me?" 

So I understand if you don't
keep my brain around for more 
than a month 
and use the jar instead to hold
peppermint candies or raspberry jam.
But for now I'll see that jar on the table
and know just how special
you think I am.

Where was I going with this? Oh, yes, all this to say that you have a right to change your mind. So don't feel bad about making the waitress cross out your original order, because it's not your fault that the person with whom you are dining ordered something that sounded so delicious you had to order it too or else you'd spend the whole meal staring at his or her plate, but demurely refusing any time he/she offered you a bite .

*this is actually not a footnote because my research is sketchy and, quite possibly, inaccurate. Facts in this blog are often distorted so as to fit whatever revelation I want them to support.